Tag Archives: mtf

Transgender Journey: Real Stories From Around The World – BOOK RELEASE!

Front CoverIn January 2015, I asked 10 questions. These questions were answered by Transgender / Gender Queer individuals from all around the world that included: all walks of life, all shapes, sizes and ages with different beliefs and life experiences.

I had no idea the profound responses I would receive. Transgender Journey: Reals Stories From Around The World is an intricate look inside the personal lives of almost 40 people located in countries spanning from the United States all the way to small dot on the map called Slovenia.

The words inside this book reach into the depths of the soul, awakening anyone who picks it up to read. This book is perfect for those who are new to the journey, for family and friends who want to learn more, or for anyone who loves reading about the fascinating journeys of others.

You may laugh, you may cry. No doubt this book will make a lasting impression in your mind (and heart) for years to come. Learn about the obstacles, the joy, the depression, the fear, the happiness, the triumph…and everything in between.

Real Stories. Real Lives. Real Answers.

Buy a copy today!

View the website!

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Hunting the job market and TRANSGENDER?

The job market being what it is, with a reported ten percent unemployment rate in Atlanta (that figure representing ten percent of the population drawing unemployment benefits- discounting those whose benefits have run out, or those who don’t draw unemployment) that means that competition for jobs is a bit fierce right now.  And employers know it- they are picking and choosing whom they hire, taking only the creme de la creme.  A recent study showed that most employers immediately discount anyone who has been unemployed for six months as an undesirable.  You obviously aren’t a desirable commoddity if you haven’t caught an employer’s eye in six months.

So where does that leave the trans community?  Those of us with passing issues face a number of hurdles in the job market already, and with employers quick to fire and reluctant to hire for the reasons of public image, HR issues and what they percieve to be ‘hassles’ in hiring the transgendered.  And even those who pass just fine may have issues with documentation, legal hurdles where everything is going along swimmingly until the gender marker issue or the birth certificate comes into play.

So what’s a poor girl to do?  Because I speak in generalization, there is no story that I can tell nearly as well as my own, and my experience tends to create the filter through which I view the world.  Y’know, like yours.  So with that in mind, let’s examine my experiences and I can explain how I arrived at my current solution.

Step 1: LOSE YOUR JOB

If you are doing well and cooking along in a career in corporate America, then more power to ya.  It’s a fine feeling- a steady paycheck, benefits and security as you work today to build yourself a better tomorrow.  And then all of a sudden the rug can be pulled out from under you- be it corporate downsizing in a poor economy, the company simply shutting down, a buyout where the first step is to slash staff or interpersonal conflict with a boss whom you make uncomfortable *cough cough*.  But pack up your desk, because you’re out the door, beyotch, bye bye bye.

Step 2: THE HUNT FOR JOB OCTOBER

Hey, no problem, plenty of fish in the sea, plenty of places out there in the same business, and you have contacts- put it out over the web and tug a little, something is bound to turn up in short order, just bide your time and feel people out and something will turn around for sure.  Update that resume and brush up on those skills, and the bank account can carry you for a bit, right?

Step 3:  WHAT THE HELL

Now it has been months, and no interviews, people aren’t returning your calls and you are really starting to sniff your armpits and wonder if maybe you haven’t got a trio of sixes branded on your forehead.  You’ve already started padding your resume and filling in that you JUST lost that job, not six months ago- after all, you know the company’s policy is to just give out the information that you worked there, period.  So you’re keeping hope alive as you go ahead and cash in the 401K- no biggie, rebuild it later, just keep paying the mortgage and putting food on the table for now.  Oh, and somehow you’ve put on 15 pounds, which makes everything better, right?  Yay.

Step 4:  WHAT THE F%$K?!?

Okay, now you have been out of work for so long you really are feeling like a leper.  Fast food jobs won’t touch you, clerk jobs won’t touch you- hell, you can’t rember the last interview.  The savings have run tight and the ebay store is actually a welcome relief income.  Depression has definitely set in and you are starting to think about answering one of those “Make $300 a day from home!” spam ads in your filter,  Your friends commisserate, yet nobody has a lead.  Your worries about the future have moved from “I’m sure something will turn up soon” to “Are we going to lose everything?”

Step 5: CHANGE THE RULES OF THE GAME

This is when you finally accept that for whatever reason, the cosmos has decided that you don’t rate a break.  Fifteen years in your old career?  So what.  Now you are overqualified, you cost too much and “oh my gawd I think that was a man in a dress” doesn’t even factor in anymore because the few and far between interviews that you have had resulted in good handshakes and feelings all around, but the cherry-picking of employers means that you aren’t being hired.  It’s time to try something else, and this is where you start investigating technical schools.  “Become a motorcycle mechanic!  Learn to be an accountant!  ITT Tech wants you!  Welding is in high deamnd right now!  Investigate an exciting career in comestology!”

A little research yields the information that student loans and grants are actually quite available these days, and sure enough, there are a number of career fields where being trans isn’t really much of an issue.  A tough mechanic chick who looks a little burly turning a wrech becomes a turnon rather than a liability.  A tall hairdresser with big hands and a winning personality is popular in any salon.  The little stout welder guy is handy to fit into those small repair spaces.  And there is a surprising amount of money to be made in those fields.

So therein hangs the lesson for today’s column; if you find the deck stacked against you and the rules of the game are getting you down, don’t keep trying the same thing expecting different results- that’s the very definition of insanity.  Instead, change the game and change the rules.  Find a new career field that suits you, get some loans- and with your name change, you might be surprised that suddenly you are elligible for all sorts of loans and grants now that you may previously have been cut off from.  Do your research, see how much money is out thre, and find a new niche to go with your new life.

After all, with all of the changes happening inside and outside of you, why not change the environment of your career as well, to match?  Because there’s nothing like a good transition and a fresh start!

Written by: Sabrina Pandora


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Filed under Job Market, Spout Out

REWARDS WHERE DUE

Sabrina Pandora

So here of late transwomen have taken a bit of a beating in the news, it seems.  There was the SNL “Estro-Maxx” skit which featured bearded guys in dresses mocking the hormone treatment of transsexuals.  Hey, lookie there, what a surprise, here we are again- the punchline of a joke.  Ha ha,  Look at the funny bearded men in dresses growing breasts.  They aren’t making much of an effort, just growing boobs and wearing dresses, and it’s funny because that’s what MtF transsexuals are, see?.  It am funny, am it not?

Yeah.  Belittling the struggle of transsexuals is super funny, so long as you view them as something other than, yannow, human.  I know.  We’re oversensitive and need to grow a sense of humor.  Here, have a laugh on me.

http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/estro-maxx/1279560/

Again, I have to point out… if it was a commercial about taking a drug to make black people become more white, would it still be funny?  Watching them wearing hip hop clothes with perhaps some awful plaid Bermuda shorts and white knee socks?

So then we move on to The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson.  Craig loves the gays.  Craig is sensitive to the gays and their plight.  So that’s why we get his “half-sister” played by a bearded hairy man in a skirt named “Peg”.  We get jokes about his naughty bits being on display while he sits there in a skirt with his legs open, he gets called a “he-she”, and it’s all oh so funny, isn’t it?  So long as being a transsexual is a joke, then you betcha.  It’s freaking hilarious.  Here, look for yourself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1J1TDKptQs

Oh yeah, that was a barrel of laughs right there.  But is it really a serious problem?  To answer this, I think that Meghan Stabler, a member of the board of directors of the HRC of all places managed to sum it up best.

“We should all be shocked and appalled with what was coming out in the
current narrative of comedy. The lives of gay and lesbian people are
being woven into the fabric of TV shows such as GLEE and Modern
Family. Even though we have a long way to go before full rights are
afforded to us, we can still be shown as equals to our peers. Comedy’s
ability to mock that part of our community has significantly lessened,
but has it done so at the risk of emphasizing the focus on the
transgender community?

I think it has, and it needs to stop.

To many of us who have journeyed along the deeply emotional and
stressful path to transition our gender, the parody and acting
portraits were utterly offensive. Hidden behind and along that journey
is significant stress, deep emotion, extreme risk and even worse —
suicide or homicide.

To live our lives authentically takes deep courage mirrored with the
real fears and deep-rooted societal prejudices that all too often
manifest themselves as workplace bigotry, un- and under-employment,
loss of family and friends, and most unfortunately, harassment and
homicides.

Some will likely argue that the portrayal was humorous, a joke, but in
true comedy there is always a punchline. Unfortunately for this one,
and for us, there was no punchline, unless you regard transition as a
joke and therefore transgender people as a human punchline. In doing
so, the comic must also understand that in conveying it as humorous
comes the risk that sometimes transgender people will be the punching
bag.”

But then we get to the Living Social Super Bowl commercial.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33jb2Ns7yaQ

Now, at first, I wanted to sigh and call it yet another cheap shot at our expense.

But then I started looking at it and considering it.

The big burly lumberjack starts getting great deals.  They open his horizons.  He moves fluidly from one experience to the next, exploring life and tasting the sweetness of it until finally we see him as a transwoman, elegant, well-dressed, hair done up nicely, makeup just right for the occasion.  She appears to be happy, confident and in control of her life.  She comments that Living Social helped her blossom, and changed her life.  And it could change yours too.

There is no mean, harsh jab here.  There is no belittlement, no human punchline.  There is no lack of a joke if you are trans.  Only a montage of the journey of one man to discover all that life has to offer and exploring what he wants from it and who he wants to be… and eventually finding herself.  It is a transwoman being shown with dignity… yes, with some humor, but it is still better treatment of the condition than I think I’ve seen in a very long time.

We are quick to come to the forefront and say when we are angry.  When we see oppression, we jump to the defense, because people need to understand that it is wrong, and that we will not sit quietly and be mocked.  We are human beings and deserve respect.  Yes, we are quick to fight, because it is still so much a part of who we are, and who we must be in a world where we have so few rights and we are fifth class citizens.

But let us not be so confrontational as to forget to take the time to thank those who see that struggle and turn a kind and even eye to it for us.  To those who might show us in a kinder and nobler light.  To those who may see us not as a joke, but instead as brave and courageous explorers of the human experience.  When someone takes the time to show us in such a light, let us take that same time that we would to vociferously defend ourselves, and instead thank those who see us as people.

So thank you, Living Social.  Thank you for painting us in a positive light.  Thank you for not making us a punchline in an unfunny joke.

Thank you for seeing and portraying us as human beings.

Written by TQ Nation Contributor:
Sabrina Pandora

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Filed under Entertainment, Spout Out, Support

Macho Men & The Femme Factor

Sabrina Pandora

I’ve noticed that there seems to be a bit of a division in the trans community, such as it were.  I thought I’d take today to comment on it.

Y’see, there are certain inequalities that exist in the trans community.  Well, let’s be honest, there are a lot of them, but today we’re going to examine one so that I can move on to my point.  And that inequality is in passing.

Between transmen and transwomen there is a very, very clear division on this, and it has been pretty accepted, so I don’t feel as though I am overstepping my bounds in making this observation.  Transmen have an easier time of it when it comes to passing than transwomen, at least on casual inspection.  After all, a short haircut, men’s clothes, a binder and a little bit of swagger can go a long ways.  Add a little facial hair to that equation and very few people really question what’s under there.  They are far more likely to jump to the conclusion ‘gay man’ then they are ‘trans man’.

But for transwomen it is usually a whole lot harder.  Trying to dress up a Y chromosome in a pretty package and make it look X so that society won’t freak out, discriminate and laugh at you is a whole lot harder.  This is arguable, but again, I’m pretty sure that I’m on target here.

So with that logical assumption made, we move on to my next observation, which is segregation between the gender fences in the trans community.  How often do you see transmen and transwomen hanging out together?  Seems pretty seldom.  Transwomen and transmen flock together all right (so long as the trans women are all either unpassable or uncaring- but that’s a column for another time).  But the intermingling just doesn’t seem to happen.  Now why is that?

Observation has told me that it is the Passing Prejudice.  The rule that says that if you are trans and you spend time with someone who does not pass well enough, then you are instead making yourself suspect as well and bringing down your own passability.  Now, mind you, this rule also applies to straights who hang out with non-passable transfolk, but somehow it usually doesn’t bother them as much.  Go figure.

Because as mentioned earlier, transmen often pass reasonably easily, whereas transwomen do not.  So in order to keep themselves from being ‘read’, they avoid their opposite numbers when they can, and certainly don’t make a habit of socializing with them.  Besides, there is that not-so-vague and not-so-quiet notion that has been circulated that transmen somehow view their sisters in transition as somehow idiotic and ridiculous.  As they are working so hard to distance themselves from stereotypically feminine behavior, habits and lifestyle, transwomen are often rushing headlong to embrace it, some at a breakneck pace.  It just makes no sense to many transmen, and much like so many activists look at the overblown drag queens on floats in parades and shake their heads that these are their representatives to the community and how they are viewed by the world at large, so too do the transmen look at the 50 year old transwoman in the too-short vinyl skirt and six inch heels and fishnet top and bra with a bedraggled wig and sigh.

But there’s something that they are missing out on, and I think that it is important enough to mention and shed a little light upon.

You see, transwomen are a huge resource for transmen that are being largely ignored.  Yes, they do tend to have their idiosyncrasies and they do have their moments, but there is a simple fact that most transmen seem to overlook when considering them.  You see, transmen, particularly when they are first starting out, do not usually have an understanding of the nuances of masculine society.  They do not understand the subtle body language, the power of a nod up or down when passing another man, the difference in the way that a self-confident man walks versus an angry man or an effeminate man.

Sure, we can argue all day about the definitions of masculinity and how it is up to the individual to define that for themselves.  You betcha, that is quite true.  But the reality of the situation is that while society has some pretty preset and concrete ideas of what is femininity, it has even stronger ideas about masculinity.  And they are very simple, very basic and very, very concrete.

And transwomen know them better than anyone else in the world.

Why?  Because they did not come naturally to them… they had to learn to emulate those masculine behaviors and adhere to those masculine codes in order to learn to survive in the society that they never chose, but was thrust upon them.  Crossing your legs the right way, keeping those hand gestures tight and firm, portraying the acceptable emotional states… all of these things and so many more are all something that transwomen had to learn, because for so many of them, it did not come naturally.  They had to ape the men around them, and often through ridicule and hazing did they find what was acceptable.

So when they encounter transmen, here is a golden opportunity.  Any transwoman who had to unlearn behaviors and body language could potentially make a fantastic tutor for transmen who are trying to hone their own masculine behaviors.  Just as walking in heels takes practice and comes with a learning curve, so too does walking in sneakers as a guy, or cowboy boots.  Women walk with their elbows in, one of the keys of feminine body language, whereas men bow their elbows out to take up more space and appear larger.  Women run their fingers through their hair one way, men do it another.  Seldom will you see a woman rubbing the scruff of her chin while thinking, whereas men seldom play with their lower lip when in thought.

All of these subtle nuances that could be transferred… lost.  And I imagine that there is some teaching to go in the other direction too, but on that I can’t speak… after all, I know a few transmen in passing, but I can’t say that I am close friends with a single one.  Why?  Because I am a transwoman.  I am high femme, and I’ve yet to meet a transman who thought I had a single solitary thing to offer him, forget about actually befriending me and spending time around me.  And apparently in this I am not alone, as I poll other transwomen that I know, and find that while we know others of our own estrogen-fueled tribe, the testosterone tribe is unknown to us all.

So here’s the call to our brothers in transition… in many cases, we’re here, we know, and we can be an invaluable resource for you if you can get over stubborn pride and seek us out.  We spent years pretending to be men, so we know a bit about the subject of outward shows of masculinity.  Perhaps we might be able to help you become the man that you want to be… and perhaps you might be able to steer us away from floral prints and leather miniskirts.

 

Written by Sabrina Pandora

TQ Nation contributor

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Filed under Spout Out, Support

Trans woman Lana Lawless aces round with LPGA

Just in time for this week’s LPGA Tour Championship, a victory for the transgender community makes a hole in one.

Lana Lawless filed suit against the LPGA on Oct. 12 in the U.S. District Court of San Francisco, a direct result of her rejected application for tour membership. The 57-year-old retired police officer suspected a violation of her rights, considering she underwent sex-reassignment surgery five years ago.

This past Tuesday, the LPGA voted an epic change to its constitutional bylaws during a players meeting to begin including members that were not assigned “female at birth.”

LPGA president Michelle Ellis noted, “This was the first hurdle. This had to be done first.”

Other sports organizations that have already amended their bylaws allowing transgender participation include the International Olympic Committee, the U.S. Golf Association, the BritishLadies Golf Union and the Ladies European Tour.

LPGA Commissioner Mike Whan delivered in a statement, “Steps will be taken in the coming weeks to make the appropriate changes to the language of the constitution.”

Whether the LPGA will adopt Olympic definitions has yet to be concluded. The details of their newly developed transgender membership remains undefined.

WRITTEN BY TRISTAN SKYE

originally posted on The GA Voice

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Filed under Legal, News, Shout Out

Body Dysphoria is Universal

I was reading an article last night about the majority of people (around 75%) are not happy with their body. This average was also estimated with elementary school children. They blamed magazines since they have truly impacted the way people view themselves. Even men now have a “look” they feel they must obtain in order to be socially attractive.

I found this very interesting since most of us within the transgender community experience what is called, “body dysphoria”. We are not unlike the majority of the rest of the population. We are certainly not alone.

One part of this equation I find most disturbing is the “skinny craze”. It’s one thing to be fit and healthy and quite another to obsess over food and the need to be thin. It can control and take over your life.

Myself, I have fluctuated from thin to average to obese over the years. Currently, for health’s sake, I am trying to rid myself of extra belly “fluff” – but, after that I’m good to go.

Some trans men try to be super thin to lose all of their curves and have a more masculine physique. I can honestly say, you don’t have to starve yourself to obtain that. You can change your body at the gym! It’s amazing what certain weight training exercises can do to manipulate your current body.

I look at my wife’s body and most FTM’s would love it (minus her chest, obviously…and another part). She is a natural bodybuilder and her physique is very muscular, vascular (veins bulging) and she has muscles most women do not – like the “boy muscle” the V shape of your side obliques that point to your package…six-pack abs, arms that are truly called “guns” and much more. And, she’s a female – no steroids, no testosterone…and she doesn’t even use creatine. Sure, it didn’t happen overnight, but her body shows me what I can do. What I can truly obtain.

The bodybuilding motto: “The body can achieve what the mind can conceive” is very true.

The main thing I want to get across is this: Get the body you want in a HEALTHY way. No other way is worth it. Your life is too important to lose early due to malnutrition or an eating disorder.

If you struggle, don’t be too proud to get help. Find a local support group atleast. Join MDjunction.com and talk to others who can help. That is a great website!

I’m over the air-brushed magazines and photoshopped models. Don’t try to look like something THEY don’t even look like in real life.

Envision yourself with a realistic viewpoint of a body you CAN achieve. Then, do it. Get a routine and stick with it.

Change your life. It’s not too late.

Written by: Tristan Skye
President and Co-Founder of  TQ Nation

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Filed under Fitness, Medical, Psychology, Spout Out, Weight Training

TQ Nation EXCLUSIVE Interview: Bianca Nicole

(Josh Romine Photography)

TQ Nation had the sensational pleasure to interview the National Entertainer of the Year 2009 (NEOY), Bianca Nicole.

Known as ‘The Goddess of Seduction’, Bianca Nicole is one of the most captivating female impersonators to ever grace the entertainment stage. She has stolen the show (and hearts) on stages all over the nation for almost 10 years and her popularity and notoriety reach new heights with every performance.

Bianca Nicole has perfected her stage performance, but it’s her personal life as an MtF (Male-to Female) Transsexual that truly shows her elegance and strength.  Bianca began her own personal journey in 2003 and is progressing to a full transition in the upcoming future.

Surrounded by the love and support of her fans, friends and most of all her family, Bianca Nicole is a name that you will hear more and more as she becomes an International icon in this community.

Are you intrigued yet? I suggest you see her amazing beauty and talent for yourself by subscribing to her YouTube channel and befriending her on Facebook. Of course, you also need to see her in person so make sure to watch for her shows and events at a venue near you.

Personally, I am not only a fan of Bianca, but also an avid supporter of her.  I have been extremely privileged to see Bianca Nicole perform on numerous occasions and highly thrilled when she asked me to share a stage with her for one of her pageant benefit shows in 2008. Bianca Nicole is a DIVA, both on and off the stage.  Her charismatic personality and the way she conducts herself is a breath of fresh air for everyone around her.  My husband  and I feel extremely honored to call her an ally and a friend.

TQ Nation had the shimmering opportunity to lip-lock (*wink*) Bianca Nicole for an exclusive interview. We asked 10 questions and received answers that were endearing, light-hearted, and uncensored about her career and personal life. She has proven, yet again, to be beyond an inspiration for T-girls everywhere and a trendsetter for the Female Impersonator’s Entertainment World. Not to mention, she is also a TQ Nation citizen!

TQ Nation

Exclusive Interview

TQ: What do you believe has been your biggest role or accomplishment that has benefited the transgendered community?

BN: I think what I believe to have been my biggest role is probably very minimal in comparison, but my personality and the way I carry myself has definitely helped the standards of what most people assume the common MTF transsexual is like. People who are very naive to our lifestyle and really only go off based on what they see on TV or read in the papers. Shows like Jerry Springer, and Cops, don’t really show the best light of people in general, but especially the trans community. These kinds of shows showcase transgirls as drug-induced, lying, cheating, disease-infested prostitutes. When people meet me who are not familiar, they are very amazed at how I am NOT like what is portrayed on television; that is sad to say, but at the same time, I am glad to open their eyes and show that the trans community is not so different than what they consider “the norm”.

TQ: What is the craziest thing one of your fans has ever done to get your attention?

BN: Um, well craziest (cute) I don’t have any moments, but craziest (psycho)…hehe.

One day, I had met a girl through a mutual friend at the club I worked at one evening. After not hearing about her in almost a month, I heard she wanted to hang out through a friend…yes, not her, but through a friend. So going to hang out with her and some friends AS FRIENDS, she eventually started talking to me, and was telling me about this girl she had a HUGE crush on and asked me what my thought were on trying to get her attention. Well I told her something nice like writing her a personal letter, and getting her a bouquet of flowers would definitely get the message across. Later that evening when we went back to our friend’s house, she sat in the dining room writing a letter, and had a friend run to the local Piggly Wiggly (yes, they still have those in some rural areas) to grab a bouquet of red roses. As soon as the friend came back with the bouquet, the girl folded up the letter, grabbed the bouquet of roses, handed me the letter and bouquet, and ran to her bedroom and locked the door…yeah, about that…

Later, that week when I came back to my friend’s house, her roommate, I was told by my friend that she had it bad for me. He showed me her room, and all over one wall was a collage of computer printed photos of myself. (insert creepy horror music here)

TQ: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

BN: Hmmm, 10 years? Well I’ve been in this industry for nearly 10 years now, and I have to say that I am amazed at what I accomplished thus far with show business and pageantry. Though when I look into the next 10 years of my life, I see myself doing other things…

~ Being established in the 9-5 career field after getting my license/degree in whatever it is I decide to do with myself
~ Having a family (whether it is just my partner and me, or if it includes mini-me’s)
~ Living somewhere out of Georgia, but not too ridiculously far from my immediate family
~ Doing more charitable work for our community

TQ: Who is the one person that has played the most significant and positive role in your life? Why?

BN: I cannot limit this answer to one individual as there are two significant people who have played and continue to play a positive role in my life, they are my parents. Though we have gone through our hard times in the beginning of understanding who I am as a person, we have overcome those obstacles, and they love me just as much, if not more than before, for being who I am. If not for them, I would not be the humble, and down-to-earth individual with a humorous personality that I am today, and if not for them I would not be blessed with such an amazing body, tan skin, gorgeous legs, and a ever so beautiful face…I’m so kidding! But yes, my parent’s are the most significant and positive role models in my life.

TQ: What do you consider to be your greatest achievement so far in life?

BN: As an entertainer, most people would assume the first thing that would come out of my mouth would be winning the nationally recognized prestigious title of National Entertainer of the Year; however, my greatest achievement, and some may count it as a blessing, is having a family that loves and supports me 150% with no questions asked. My parents (and yes, biological) and sister, have been so supportive of me and who I am, I came from a Roman Catholic family and to top it off, Republican. To be the only genetic male born of my parents, I find the greatest achievement in my life thus far is having the unconditional love and support of my family.

TQ: Being a face in the “limelight”, what types of privacy or safety concerns have you faced? How did you deal with them?

BN: I’ve never really had to deal with something like this as far as safety is concerned, but privacy concerns I am not a stranger to. When I lived in the city of Atlanta, I made the mistake of living in the heart of midtown, where EVERYONE knew where I lived. I am a very private and quite individual when I do not have to work at the clubs, I like to keep things low-key. I used to deal with “friends” coming over at 3 or 4 in the morning, unannounced and overly intoxicated. It became really tiring, really quick. Now, I reside in a quaint home with a couple of close friends, in a peacefully quite neighborhood where NO ONE comes to visit unexpectedly, and I LOVE it.

TQ: What’s the biggest piece of advice you would give someone who wants to follow in your footsteps?

BN: The best piece of advice I ever took was what I always lived by and learned on my own. “Let the ‘can’ts’ and the ‘don’ts’ push you to climb the steps of the ‘can’s’ and the ‘do’s’.” In other words, let the skepticism of others make you want to achieve all your dreams, and let the people that genuinely what to help you do so. I grew up in the entertainment industry having some people tell me that I will never go anywhere or be anyone within our community, but I had people that believed I could do whatever I put my mind to. Another piece of advice I would give is to be humble. Attitudes of grandeur are unbecoming and people will remember you in a negative light. I couldn’t have gotten where I am today by being a bitch who thought everyone was beneath me and everything was owed to me.

TQ: Notably being one of the most beautiful and talented Entertainers with a large following, it’s not surprising that you are a very desired woman within the community. One thing everyone wants to know: what are you looking for in a partner?

BN: Wow, if I haven’t been asked this question enough..lol. I have been with men, women, and transguys. With that said, it should be apparent that it is not what is in between the legs that I seek. I look for genuine, considerate, and sincere individuals with a masculine spirit and look, but also with a slight sensitive side. Being in the show business industry, I do not need someone who is constantly jealous, possessive, or has trust issues. I am popular and am constantly socializing and networking; the person who is going to be with me cannot have insecurity issues. In my everyday life, I need that person to be someone who is family-oriented, whether it be their family or my family. I seek someone with goals and ambitions, and a drive to want to do something with their life other than live at a bar.

TQ: TQ Nation is giving you a personal soap box – What do you want to say? (include your spout outs, vents, complaints, thanks or anything you want people to know)

BN: My 2010 philosophy is “I don’t give a fuck!” so there will be no vents or complaints. I am a pretty happy person and have learned that not everyone is going to understand or agree with the way I live my life, and I don’t give a fuck! 🙂

However, I do want to thank my fans for supporting my art form because if it weren’t for all of you who believed in my talent and beauty, I would not be standing here as who I am today. To my friends, some have come and gone through the years and through different stages of my transition, to those of you who made an impact, I thank you; to my friends who have been there since the beginning and are still around…I love you unconditionally. Speaking of unconditional love, to my mother, father, and sister, for supporting me and my life completely and whole-heartedly. I am so freaking lucky to have you all by my side, and God has a special place for people like you, at least in my book you should. I love you.

TQ: What upcoming events, appearances or movies can your fans look forward to?

BN: As National Entertainer of the Year, I have numerous appearances all over the nation, in fact, I am just back in from appearances in Los Angeles, San Diego, and Honolulu. Dallas, TX; Toronto, Ontario, CAN; Las Vegas, NV; Buffalo, NY; Phoenix, AZ; Washington, D.C.; and of course, Atlanta, GA, just to name a few. (Look for a full 2010 list of appearances on my profile)



Written by TQ Nation 1st Lady, Sicily Skye

Join the Revolution: www.TQnation.com

TQ Nation had the sensational pleasure to interview the National Entertainer of the Year 2009 (NEOY) aka “The Goddess of Seduction’, Bianca Nicole.  Bianca Nicole is one of the most captivating female impersonators to ever grace the entertainment stage. She has stolen the show on stages all over the nation for almost 10 years and her popularity and notoriety hits new heights with every performance.

Bianca Nicole has perfected her stage performance, but it’s her personal life as a MtF (Male-to Female) Transsexual that truly shows her elegance and strength.  Bianca started to live her life as a transgendered woman in 2003 and is continuing her own personal journey to a full transition in the upcoming future. Surrounded by the love and support of her fans, friends and most of all her family, Bianca Nicole is a name that you will hear more and more as she becomes an international icon in this community.

Are you intrigued yet?….., I suggest you see her amazing beauty and talent for yourself by subscribing to her YouTube channel http://www.youtube.com/MissNEOY2009 , Befriend her onhttp://www.facebook.com/bncanlas and http://www.facebook.com/thegoddessofseduction . Of course, you also need see her in person so make sure to watch for her shows and events at a venue near you.

Personally, I am not only a fan of Bianca, but also an avid supporter of her.  I have been extremely privileged to see Bianca Nicole perform on numerous occasions and highly thrilled when she asked me to share a stage with her for one of her pageant benefit shows in 2008. Bianca Nicole is a DIVA, both on and off the stage.  Her charismatic personality and the way she conducts herself is a breath of fresh air for everyone around her.  Tristan and I feel extremely honored to call her an ally and a friend.

TQ Nation had the shimmering opportunity to lip-lock (*wink*) Bianca Nicole for an exclusive interview. We asked 10 questions and received answers that were endearing, light-hearted, and uncensored about her and her life. She has proven, yet again, to be beyond an inspiration for T-girls everywhere and a trendsetter for the Female Impersonator’s Entertainment World. Not to mention, she is also a TQ Nation citizen!

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