Tag Archives: gay

Newt Gingrich…Be a MAN! DOMA is a CROCK!

Yeah, Newt, use your BRAIN!

This morning as I was driving in wee early hours, watching the windshield wipers blur my vision, I was listening to talk radio and heard something that made my ears perk up.

They were talking about Newt Gingrich apologizing to Evangelical Christians for his extra-marital affairs. His reasoning? He did it because of his “allegiance to the flag”, suggesting his “long hours” serving the Nation led him down the dark road of sexual temptation. Give me a break, Newt! Be a MAN…own up and take full responsibility for your actions instead of making excuses and blaming it on something else! (read all about it).

“Presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich has claimed that he had an affair with a colleague because he was working too hard.

The twice-divorced Republican politician was married to his second wife Ginther when he embarked on an affair in the mid-90s with blonde Castilla Bisek who is 23-years his junior.

Gingrich was at the time an outspoken critic of President Bill Clinton who had a notorious affair with 22-year-old White House intern Monical Lewinsky.”

Here we have a politician who serves our country in his THIRD marriage and who fully supports DOMA. What’s that, you ask? DOMA is the Defense of Marriage Act that President Bill Clinton (yeah, him!) signed back in the 90’s which keeps marriage between a man and a woman.

In 1998, I wrote my English 101 college term paper on same-sex marriage. I had to research BOTH sides and even back then I saw what a big crock it was.

You have people who have had numerous marriages, countless affairs, telling other people that love each other they can’t get married because they are the same sex?

I heard a great quote once where someone said, “How about we tell them if we can’t get married, then they can’t get divorced.”

Even as a married trans man, I still am irked to no end by the ignorance and hypocrisy of this as I look to my brothers and sisters who are deeply in love, have been a couple for years, and still are refused legal marriage.

Some opposite-sex straight couples refuse to take the plunge until there is marriage equality, like musicians Tristan Prettyman and Jason Mraz. They are not alone, either.

Yes, today I’m on my soapbox! I’m P.O.ed that a drunk guy can marry a stripper in Vegas and wake up the next day and not even remember it, let alone know each other’s names! That’s marriage they are trying to DEFEND? Where’s the “sanctity” in that?!?

If you want to defend marriage and make sure there is sanctity in it – make ALL couples undergo 6 months of marriage counseling prior to marriage and have it signed off by a qualified official!

Other countries are WAY ahead of us, even the Canadians! Yet, the US of “Nay” remains in the dark ages due to people holding us back.

Oh! And I’m going to go there…guess what other minority votes AGAINST gay marriage? African Americans! People who know first-hand what it’s like to be treated like a second-class citizen. Am I comparing the civil rights movement to the gay rights movement? NO. I’m comparing the fact that minorities should atleast have the decency to stand up for one another.

Ignorance and FEAR is what breeds HATE. I have read plenty of comments directed to myself and even my wife telling us, “I hope you die of AIDS” ( and in reference to being Transgender) “That’s scary!” First off, I guess they think we’re running around having unprotected sex with random people and that’s how we will get AIDS? They don’t “get it” that we are a married couple in a monogamous relationship. But, the part that get’s me is the “scary” part. They are SCARED of what they don’t understand and instead of educating themselves, it’s easier for them to cower down and say a hateful comment to ease their “petrified” little minds.

Last time I checked, those who say cruel things remind me of elementary school kids who haven’t reached a maturity level to speak with intelligence and have enough self-control to contain their feelings, instead of igniting malicious behavior.

BACK to the subject at hand…President Obama isn’t my favorite guy who ever slept in the White House, but he has made some progressive changes for the GLBTQ community. Recently, he would not resign DOMA saying it was unconstitutional, so I’m hoping marriage equality will be around the corner! (read all about it). I want to be able see my best friends share the legal freedom to love each other and commit the rest of their lives.

Newt Gingrich suggested impeachment of President Obama over the DOMA issue stating, “President Obama overstepped his constitutional bounds when he announced he would no longer defendDefense of Marriage Act in court.” (read all about it).

New York also recently passed a law that allows Transgender couples to marry without conflict, another step in the right direction. As it stands now, there is a lot of footwork, legal changes, surgery and more in order to be able to legally get married if you are Transgender. (read all about it).

*deep breath*

I needed to vent and appreciate you listening to me. NEVER stop fighting for your rights. NEVER take less than what you deserve.

Written by TRISTAN “SHIMMER” SKYE
President and Co-Founder of TQ Nation

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The Courage to DIE? The Right to TELL!

(Getty Images)

It appears that the HOT topic in recent debate is on reversing the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy written in the law for our U.S. military that keeps the GLB community “hush, hush” over their sexual orientation in order to serve their country.

For the “T” crowd (Transgender), it’s more about keeping your gender identity hidden, which embarks on a whole new playing field…and an even HOTTER debate.

It will take a majority of both houses of Congress to lift the ban that was written into law during the Clinton Administration.

Prior to Clinton’s botched effort in 1993 to force the military to accept gay personnel in its ranks, the ban on gays serving had simply been a presidential directive that could be unilaterally reversed by the White House.

In 1993, Gen. Colin L. Powell, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs at the time, opposed allowing gay men and lesbians to serve openly in the military; however, he did support a compromise, which was the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” bill passed by Congress.

For many years since, those who “came out” and admitted they were gay in the military (some pressured or “forced”) would be discharged and sent home. More than 13,000 discharges of gays and lesbians, including those of much-needed Arabic translators, have been recorded. This is not due to them not serving “honorably” or “effectively”, it is simply due to their sexual orientation being made known.

I witnessed this personally with the USAF back around 10 years ago. I was stationed at Lackland AF base in San Antonio, TX for basic training. I was appointed the leader of my flight and doing incredibly well … until I ran into two issues.

(1) During a routine locker inspection, my notebook was revealed and my training instructor read aloud things I had written (poetry and letters home) that made it blatantly clear that I was “gay”. On impulse, I snatched the notebook from his hands, which only infuriated him more. After that, he told me he didn’t want to see that again; yet, he didn’t “ask”. Later on, I went into his office and came clean. I asked myself, “Am I truly willing to risk my life for a country that expects me to hide who I am?” To my surprise, he actually tried to talk me out of it and told me to think it over before I would be discharged. He addressed that I was doing very well and would graduate basic training as an honor graduate. I tossed the idea back and forth for several moments in my heated mind; however, I finally agreed to think over … hiding my identity in order to serve my country.

(2) Less than a week later, I was discharged due to a medical conflict…mild asthma I never knew I had before. Call it fate, or call it “everything happens for a reason”.

I was transferred to another barrack where those discharged waited to go home. I was put on one end of the hallway with approximately 50-60 others. Those labeled with psychological issues were separated from us and had their own place across the hall. Most of those in the “psych dorm” had tried to or threatened to commit suicide.

I “patiently” waited for three weeks to go home and during that time befriended many others who were waiting. Many of whom were leaving due to being gay.

People might suspect they were going home because of “coming on” to someone, “flaunting” their sexuality or because the military was “too much” for them. None of those I met left for those reasons. Most had similar situations that I had, or worse. Some had situations were rumors flew and their “friends” turned against them, doing everything (including lying) to get them discharged.

I had a good friend who served in the U.S. Army Reserves. On the weekends she had training, I would see her remove her HRC “Equality” sticker from her car before she drove to the base. She had to be extra careful not to reveal any aspect of that part of her. When some brave soldiers and sailors would walk in the Gay Pride Parade, she would watch from the sidelines … too afraid to be seen and get in trouble. She also would never display any public affection (including holding hands) with her partner of 8 years. Hiding her identity in one part of her life, inhibited her in other areas of her life.

I have been aware of news over the years where a gay soldier or sailor had been murdered. I decided to do a little bit of research and uncovered many cases of soldiers and sailors brutally attacked and/or murdered for being gay. Who were they murdered by? Mostly, those serving with them…their “brothers” and/or “sisters”.

It is a fact that HATE CRIMES happen everywhere. Even in situations where you are supposed to be fighting together against the enemy; instead, brother turns against brother, sister turns against sister . . .  and makes one of his own the enemy.

“No matter how I look at this issue, I cannot escape being troubled by the fact that we have in place a policy which forces young men and women to lie about who they are in order to defend their fellow citizens.” Those were the words of Adm. Mike Mullen, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, speaking last week before a Senate panel.

____________________________________________________________________

A letter to the editor of Daily Press read:

I feel President Barack Obama has opened up a can of worms (what’s new?) with his proposed policy on gays serving openly in the military. I served in the military for more than 20 years and of course knew of numerous gays who served with dignity but did not flaunt their sexual orientation.

What happens when gay military members are serving in a state where same-sex marriage is permitted? Will the military recognize that marriage and issue dependent ID cards, housing allowance, medical coverage, etc.? Will there be complaints of sexual discrimination when military discipline is justified? What’s next? Transgender individuals serving in the military? Maybe the military will provide the medical care for the operation?

I was proud to serve my country, but I’m glad I am not still in.

Fred Whitesell
Hampton

____________________________________________________________________

Like I said earlier, allowing transgender individuals to be open in the military is an entirely new playing field. A more challenging one at that.

If President Obama can get this military ban reversed, it will be next step towards marriage equality. I have always felt that until our gay soldiers can serve openly in the military, we will not see 100% marriage equality.

I’m curious your viewpoints on the positive and negative effects of reversing “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”.

Time for you to SPOUT OUT!


Written by TQ Nation President: Tristan Skye


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“Two Steps Forward, One Step Back” for Marriage Equality

May 9, 2009 marked a joyous day when the governor of Maine officially signed same-sex marriage into law.

“I have come to believe that this is a question of fairness and of equal protection under the law, and that a civil union is not equal to civil marriage,” Maine Gov. John Baldacci, a Democrat, said in a statement released as he signed the bill.

“This law is simply about making sure that loving, committed couples, and their families, receive equal rights and responsibilities. This is a step that will strengthen Maine families,” Human Rights Campaign President Joe Solmonese said in a written statement.

6 months later, voters appear to have a change of heart as the state of Maine today joins the 30 other states that reject same-sex marriage.

Again, this is a moment where the GLBTQ community are given rights just to have them ripped away. In my personal opinion, marriage equality will continue to be a back-n-forth game until this important issue progresses beyond the States and is firmly planted on  Federal ground.

I have never before heard of this type of yo-yo law making until this particular issue was uprooted and put on the political platform. I do not hear of state’s granting abortions, then taking that right away. That is because the issue of abortion made its way into the federal courts, surpassing the mere state legislation. We take “two steps forward, one step back” when we deal with decision makers that rank under the “big dogs” that reside in our nation’s capital.

As I “spouted out” in my previous post, how can we expect to have equal marriage when our military still remains in the closet? They can defend our country and die, yet cannot be gay, lesbian or transgender. President Obama only in recent weeks signed the Hate Crimes Bill into law. These are the “baby steps” we need in order to climb steadfastly up the equality ladder. Abolishing “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” is our next baby step.

Since the word “marriage” seems to enrage people of a closed mind, have we thought of pushing for “civil unions” / “domestic partnership” first? Baby steps.

Sure, I agree we are discriminated against, but we cannot “change” the minds and opinions of these people no matter how many letters we write or protests we march as activists in. Those are great to show we have a voice and are not going away, but in order for us to truly progress, I am a firm believer in “baby steps”. To us, we are asking for nothing more than equal rights. To them, we are asking for something HUGE. So, why not start asking for smaller things to help pave the way to larger things? Just my thoughts.

Next in the political arena today we have elected an openly  homophobic politician to share power in Virginia. Ken Cuccinelli’s win as attorney general is another step back for the GLBTQ community.

Ken Cuccinelli

Cuccinelli was quoted recently in the Virginian-Pilot to state, “homosexual acts are wrong. They’re intrinsically wrong. And I think in a natural law based country it’s appropriate to have policies that reflect that.”

The fight turns now to New Jersey where Democrat and marriage equality supporter Jon Corzine was unseated by Republican and marriage equality opposer Christopher Christie. Two months remain for legislature to pass a marriage bill with Corzine finishing his final days of his term. Even still, the Garden State must wait a minimum of four years to gain full marriage rights.

In my opinion, Washington is the state that is taking the correct “baby steps” as voters accept and pass a Domestic Partnership (DP) law (tagged “everything but marriage”), while the voters reject the law for “marriage” time and time again.

Most people are not startled by the term “domestic partner” and might be open to grant recognition for our relationships; however, the term “married” still stirs havoc in the minds that can only acknowledge “one man, one woman” and cannot see past that. Of course, I should make the point that it is “one BIO man, one BIO woman” that they can handle. God forbid we try to open their minds further to the transgender community just yet.

“Never let your head hang down. NEVER GIVE UP AND SIT DOWN AND GRIEVE. Find another way.” – Satchel Paige

In the face of adversity is when you must fight the hardest. When you have a hard time standing back up, that is the time to grab your neighbor by the hand and trudge forward together. In the chaos and the screaming, stay calm in your heart, but raise your voice and be heard. When they come against you, do not lower yourself and come back against them. Believe in the great and wonderful person you are and keep standing, keep moving forward and never give up fighting for a brighter tomorrow.

“Almost always, the creative dedicated minority has made the world better. Change does not roll in on the wheels of inevitability, but comes through continuous struggle. And so we must straighten our backs and work for our freedom. A man can’t ride you unless your back is bent. Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. Freedom is never voluntarily given by the oppressor; it must be demanded by the oppressed. ” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

I find it important to note that the consensus reveals that many anti-marriage equality voters are African American. This is why I chose a quote by Martin Luther King, Jr. — a man who died to bring equality to a minority. I only pray that the ones who choose to now HATE a minority (as they once were) will open their eyes and one day see the light of never restraining freedom from another human being. This time it’s not about the color of skin, but about whom they choose to love. We must remember it’s not about skin color, sexual orientation…but, by the “content of one’s character” we define a man.

Years ago, one great man had a dream. Today, I have a dream. I have a dream that one day those who once had thoughts of killing a gay man will invite him over for dinner. I have a dream that one day the preacher that once condemned the lesbian to hell will marry her and her wife. I have a dream that one day the person who beat transgenders will drop to his knees and beg for forgiveness. I have a dream that the bully who drives gay teens to suicide will instead come to their rescue and be their support. Yes, I too have a dream. This is only a small piece of it. A piece of a large puzzle that I hope one day will all be put together.

Baby steps, my family…baby steps.

Written by Tristan


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“To Discriminate Only Generates HATE”

Exposing HATE. Yesterday, I found a lot of HATE on Twitter just to remind us that it is still out there. HATE brews every single day. It gets stronger…it gets deeper…it gets more evil.

I did a search on twitter.com for this: itshouldbeillegal gays (and a few more searches including transgender, homosexual, lesbian.)

#itshouldbeillegal was a trending topic yesterday (and still is today) and I noticed A LOT of hate and it was disturbing. One thing I noticed was that the HATE came from a people once a minority themselves, African Americans (also mostly men). I fail to  understand since logically you would think they would be the ones to rise up to take a stand for others for equal human rights.

Some of the tweets talked about wanting to get all of the gays together and killing them all — many were about hating them…it should be illegal to be one, be forced to respect them — one “tweeter” said it should be illegal for gays to get married and then he said…”oh, wait! it is! HAHA LOL!!!” — I think I had forgotten how much HATE there is still in the world…silly me thought the GLBTQ community had really made a lot of progress and have overcome most all opposition.

Some tweets were very positive and I want to note that. Some were saying it should be illegal to discriminate against the GLBTQ community…I was just disturbed by the people who bluntly said they wanted to kill them all. WOW. To hate a group of people that much when they don’t affect your life at all…it’s beyond me. There are plenty of people in this world I don’t necessarily “agree” with  but I wouldn’t want to kill all of them (or ANY of them). The only people that should ever be killed, in my personal opinion, are those who truly deserve it – like murderers and child molesters, etc.

*side note* I had NO idea that the new “lingo” on the street was to say “No Homo” after saying something that might sound “gay”.


HATE TWEETS EXPOSED

WTC_J_ezy #itshouldbeillegal for me not to gather all the gays in one spot then demolish they add at my own expense (of course he can’t spell or write…maybe we should kill him for that). **too bad he can’t type, should we kill him for that?**
Sumboi #itshouldbeillegal to be a Trans
steezthegreat #itshouldbeillegal to be gay/lesbian……i said it, yup yup i said it
kreammm #itshouldbeillegal for lesbian couples to be ugly. =/ girl on girl should only be w\kute females . **someone watches too much porn? Reality check.**
RasclotITSbobbi #itshouldbeillegal to be Gay, Lesbian, Bi. Etc.
druisamonster #itshouldbeillegal to be a lesbian
DBlack4SFS #itshouldbeillegal 2 b a flaming homo **so a “regular” homo would be okay?**
Abdi_20 #itshouldbeillegal to be homosexual .
JoelCrouse #itshouldbeillegal to have abortions and homosexual marriages **at the same time? just curious.**
kvon105 #itshouldbeillegal 4 men to be gay fucking fag bags **fag bag? oh, he’s clever.**
iFresh_since89 #itshouldbeillegal for girls to be gay!! they taking all the hoes!! **not like they would want you even if they were straight…sorry.**
JBC83 #itshouldbeillegal to be gay… I Cant stand the gays


Another sidenote* — So, are people truly this homophobic because of their own personal insecurities??

http://twitter.com/KRtweets — I pulled some of his tweets — the guy LOOKS gay (prob why he hates them so much) — he has SERIOUS issues.

KRTweets #itshouldbeillegal to be a faggot. Yes I hate gays.
#youmakemesick homosexuals.
@WWE_is_Awesome man child please, hope your parents die of AIDS. **I can’t even comment on this one**
#youmakemesick gays.


STOP the HATE


ON A POSITIVE NOTE (is that a c minor? hmm)

http://www.sovo.com/thelatest/thelatest.cfm?blog_id=27785

President Obama intends to sign into law Wednesday a long-sought hate crimes protection measure as part of a major defense bill, according to an administration source.

The president plans to pen his name to the fiscal year 2010 defense authorization bill, which includes a provision known as the Matthew Shepard & James Byrd Jr. Hate Crimes Prevention Act. The measure would make illegal hate crimes based on actual or perceived sexual orientation and gender identity, among other categories, and would allow the Justice Department to assist in the prosecution of such crimes.

Brandon Teena (1972 - 1993)

I am going to end with some lyrics from the song “Where is the Love?” by the Black-Eyed Peas:

I think the whole worlds addicted to the drama
Only attracted to the things that bring you trauma
Overseas yeah we tryin to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin
In the USA the big CIA the Bloodz and the Crips and the KKK
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And if you hatin you’re bound to get irate
Yeah madness is what you demonstrate
And that’s exactly how anger works and operates
You gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love y’all

People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can you practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father Father Father help us
Send some guidance from above
Cause people got me got me questioning
Where is the love?

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I’m getting older y’all people get colder
Most of us only care about money makin
Selfishness got us followin the wrong direction
Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting their young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanna act like what the see in the cinema
Whatever happened to the values of humanity
Whatever happened to the fairness and equality
Instead of spreading love, we’re spreading anomosity
Lack of understanding, leading us away from unity
That’s the reason why sometimes I’m feeling under
That’s the reason why sometimes I’m feeling down
It’s no wonder why sometimes I’m feeling under
I gotta keep my faith alive, until love is found

Peace & LOVE,

Tristan Skye


www.TransQueerNation.com

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